Beyonce says you have such a big ego....I call Bullshit

Ego…..
This has been a theme that has recurred in my life for the past two days. yesterday while Lauren and I were reading our zodiac signs I picked up a book called “The Dark Zodiac” or something like that. It gives all the BAD qualities about your sign. Lauren made the statement “you might not like what you read!” So this brings me to the topic for the day:

There are certain things I KNOW about myself. The qualities of who I am have been ingrained in me for many years, they are not a secret, they are not pending issues, and they just are! I accept them, for they make up the core of my being. However, those not so nice little qualities about me, I try really hard (with some success) to keep in check! After 3 years of graduate school I was forced to take a cold hard look at myself, I felt naked if you will. Emotionally vulnerable! Like my boss always said “the only way to create change is to create discomfort.” Boy oh boy was I uncomfortable through that process. Change takes looking at the deepest darkest part of you and either changing it, modifying it, accepting it, or getting rid of it all together.

Too often in my little town of Pueblo Colorado I see people who have no clue. They live in this little bubble with no mirrors. I mean mirrors figuratively speaking only (no puns on peoples appearance although that’s another blog entirely). With no “mirrors” how can you take an objective look at yourself and realize that sometimes the problems aren’t with other peoples “jealousy” it’s about YOU!? I try very hard to be patient with people, and accept them where they are at, until they burn me in some way. So I decided to write this blog and just vent a little bit! I am VERY content with the variety of people in my life, I am content with the path I have traveled and the road that lay before me, so don’t take this entry as discontent! I just think people need to take the time to evaluate who they are! Stop hiding from your ugly insides and change them!

There will come a time in everyone’s life when they are faced with those “ugly insides” and we make choices. We ignore them and blame everyone else (which, gets us nowhere), or we evaluate, moderate, change, adapt who we are, how we interact with people, and how we treat our fellow man. This may be a higher level of thinking, and a higher level of being, BUT for the sake of this post it is IMPORTANT! Self actualization should be at the top of everyone’s “to do list.” I enjoy reading past journal entries and reminiscing about the person I once was, admiring the evolution of myself.

So this is a cheers to my former self, my current self, and my future self, I hope some people who I have encountered can also make the changes necessary to move towards being a happier, self actualized, person, if you cannot, you will forever live in your little bubble where everything is everyone else’s fault and you have no “egg on your face.” The rest of us will move on….